Monday, April 12, 2010

The Other PT

Or do you prefer TL? Playette's daycare does.

They're all, "We don't say 'potty training' because we feel that it gives the wrong impression. 'Toilet learning' is preferred."

Well, alrighty then. Whatever gets my kid outta dipes.


Lisa was talking about it.

Ds New Mama wass talking about it.

Figured I'd jump on the bandwagon.

I've been learning quite a bit from reading about other people's experiences. In fact, Lisa gave me the term that I think best describes where Playette is currently: schedule trained. And the way we got her there is not too unlike what Ds New Mama is doing with her daughter. Except all I really know about Elimination Communication is that when Playette stops what she's doing and makes the silent grunt face, we know she's eliminatin'. I'm not sure how people catch a child pre-urine. We just seem to get lucky (sometimes) with that part.

Anyway, going back to the beginning, BD started putting Playette on the potty 1x/day (right after dinner) last year. I think I was away on reserve duty so it was May and she was about 22 months old. Since then, she's done awesome and will sometimes alert us to her needs by signing potty/toilet (we say potty with her). She is becoming more and more routine-oriented in many facets of her life, so it's no surprise to us that her post-dinner trip to the potty is the most reliable. Some people have a mint. Playette chooses to cleanse her palette a little differently.

When we addressed what we were doing at home with regard to making the transition from diapers to underwear at Playette's IFSP meeting in July, we got a lot of this:

Ah, blank stares to the sounds of crickets chirping.

Gotta love a good IFSP meeting.

If you've never been to one, feel free to join one of mine any time you want. If you're not stressed out at the end, you're bored to tears. Awesome.

So. Once our "team" came to, there was a lot of stammering which essentially resulted in zero support outside of the home (she's in daycare full-time) until about 6 weeks ago.

In the meantime, we continued with the post-dinner trips and then, one day a few months ago after a trip to Ikea, we upped the ante.

Not able to resist a deal, we bought 2 of these colorful pots at $0.99 each. One for the trunk of the car and one for the upstairs bathroom right next to her room. So with those and the cushy one we'd been using downstairs and the cute little mini-toilets at daycare (I don't know what I said differently one day, but they finally caught on and started offering her the toilet), we started seeing some more progress.

While this has been a long road, it really hasn't been a stressful one. We've taken it verrrry slowly. No pressure.

Sure, we get frustrated when she doesn't ask to go and instead we're alerted by a strange smell in the room. Who wouldn't?

But we enjoy the heck out of the successes. Two weeks ago, when we were out to brunch on Easter, she signed potty at the table and actually meant it. I'm telling you, this little girl is better than me with the whole using a public bathroom thing.

Do I think that she'd be rocking some Dora drawers by now if she were typically developing? I sure do. But she's not and it's just going to take longer. We're ok with that. In fact, good or bad, I never really expected her to be out of diapers by age 3. I mean, when we moved to CA, I learned that diaper reimbursement was available essentially once a child was out of the early intervention program and I figured that's just the way things were. It was going to happen later and that was that. I've seen some really bright kids make the transition later for varying reasons. They all get it eventually and it's so not a race.

Honestly, now what I fear is that we've simply given her options. Diaper, pull-up, or potty? I don't think she minds where she pees so eventually we just need to bite the bullet and give panties a try. Scary thought.

But, our weather isn't very conducive to the run around nekkid approach, so I can't say that we really know how to take the next step anyway.

So we wait. And cheer when there's #1 and #2 in the pot. We dance (our own unique dances). We wash hands and then we play. Until the next time we see the silent grunt face. At which time we grab her and run.

We're totally winging it.

I welcome any and all feedback.


Tara said...

I wish I had some words of wisdom for you, but honestly, after training 5 children, I can tell you that I wing it every time! You're doing great, by the sound of it!

sheree said...

I have no advice/suggesstions but just wanted to say I was TOTALLY amazed when you and the Littlest came to stay with us a few weeks back. I mean, really...that is awesome!

I get what you're saying about giving her too many options but like I said, you are changing less diapers so that's something to celebrate, right?

Maybe you guys just need to come for a long weekend during the summer and have a nekkid bootcamp session or something.

Molly said...

excuse me... toilet learning? WTF! What is the rationale behind that?

At my preschool we have potty partiessssss. They're hilarious. Two of our kids are potty trained and the rest are like "yo dude, I don't know how I feel about this"

Kimberley said...

I just have to say that Malea is leaps and bounds ahead of Amberley! I also have to say that you are so much more patient than me! Hmmm...I wonder if that has something to do with it? I am so bummed that we didn't get to meet...I was really looking forward to it. Oh well, hopefully this summer with both our "toilet learn-ed" girls. :)

AZ Chapman said...

she is learning she will be in Dora underwhere in no time

Andrea said...

My "typical" girls all potty trained right around 3. I didn't push potty training with them. I do think to many options give them just that. I used pull ups at night only and that was once they were day potty trained (I didn't expect them to get through the night). Once the pull up was dry for several weeks, that was gone too. I know that w/Kamryn I might feel different, the PT will become "more" because I am sure I will associatie it w/development...but rest asssured, you know it will come, because it will! I will need your advice and info when we get there! :)

heather said...

If she is showing interest right now, I'd start it full time. My friends who have potty trained their kids with Ds at an earlier age have been more successful and had a faster training time than those of us that waited for our child to be more "ready". There is a great book called "Toilet training in less than a day" by Azrin that was written in the 70's. It was originally written to help kids get toilet trained who had intellectual disabilities. I wish I would've read it before I started Morgan. He has great ideas with using a doll who pees and lets the child see the doll get the reward for peeing and staying dry. I've been really frustrated with toilet training. We waited to long for Morgan and she was doing really well and then the school made her go back in pull ups . . . and she has regressed to almost worse than when we started. Anyway. Long comment, but just wanted to say I'd bite the bullet and do it NOW. It never gets any easier or a better time.